The Soul’s Journey

Image credit: “Soul’s Journey” by Freydoon Rassouli – http://rassouli.com

A “personal” update on the eternal journey – see my blog at The Blazing Heart Foundation for more informational/instructional posts.

Several years ago, I used to write extensively. The love of writing has been something that has lived strongly in me since very early childhood, and which feels like an inextricably interwoven thread of the tapestry of my soul. I even wrote and published a book of poetry (in late 2013). It documented my journey from one level of life to another, through the ins and outs of travels through vast cosmic dimensions, yet still within the realm of a personal dream. 

The depth and extent of emotional pain I was experiencing at that point was so great that the only way I could survive it was to turn it into something beautiful. I was drowning in grief so engulfing that the only way to breathe was to create poetry of the agony, which allowed me to keep my head above water just long enough to take big gulps of some kind of life-sustaining substance. I feel that this is how the human soul copes in the face of overwhelming tragedy.

This is why writing, song, and imagery that depicts emotional sadness is described as being “beautiful”. Those who can express in this format are hailed as delivering a balm to weary souls. This is because, in the face of the unbearable, finding something beautiful within it is a lifeline that ensures the survival of the spirit. We find such expressions of what is ultimately great suffering to be beautiful, because it reminds us that we too might be beautiful, and of beauty, even in our imperfect and flawed vision of ourselves. It reminds us that hope in a dark world might exist after all. It reminds us that if we can see beauty in the darkest of places, then there is still a chance for our redemption.

At the end of 2014, an unthinkable event occurred in my life. I had a positively and absolutely cataclysmic “falling out” with a sister who I had been very close to. I am not the type of person to “fall out” with anyone, so this was shocking and traumatic to the very depths of my being. In truth, this was a fated parting that signalled the absolute death beyond any possibility for resuscitation of an old way of being whose time had well and truly come.

Following this event, which left me shattered for almost two whole years, my ability to write was all but dissolved completely. I did not know it at the time, but what was actually underway was a process of completely and totally altering the way in which I expressed myself, and the place that it was coming from. Though it was not something I knowingly chose to go through, a deeper and even largely conscious part of my being had prayed for emancipation from the illusions that has bound me, and got exactly what it has asked for. Over the course of these two years, as the layers of shock wore off, I came to understand that I had been forcibly extracted from a reality in which I very much did not belong, and which was in fact the reality of separation from the Source of Life in a nutshell.

During the course of this process, something changed in the fundamental nature of how I was able to show up in life creatively.

As I searched for a way to reignite my ability to express as I had done previously, I faced wall after wall of frustration. Moreover, any little shred that I did manage to express felt so profoundly wrong that it hurt. I wrote, and then immediately felt the need to retract what I had said. I began to have the sense that I was trapped in a period of mandatory silence. Slowly but surely it dawned on me why this was… I had developed such power in my ability to articulate great depths of understanding that had the potential to influence others who might also be of great benevolent benefit to humanity, that it was absolutely critical that I not articulate even a single word of illusion! To do so may have had dire consequences. I could no longer live my full potential while holding onto even a single shred of “what was”. It took some time to fully digest, but the challenge I had been gifted was one of immense privilege.

So thoroughly was the destructuring that was underway throughout every hidden crevice of my existence, that to utter a word while in the depths of that process felt like it came with the huge risk of inadvertently crystallizing something that was ultimately not real, and that would surely have fallen away by the next day. Only this year have I come to understand the full implications of why it was so crucial not to do this, and even then I don’t pretend to fully understand beyond even the vaguest glimpse.

All patterns that are of the dream of separation must fall away as we prepare for the inexplicably wondrous journey of entering a reality of limitlessness, something that has never before been possible in the history of cosmic evolution. Every tiny shred of the way in which one might function on a day to day basis has to be gone over with the finest tooth comb imaginable. There is simply no place in a limitless reality for the habitual and programmed mechanisms of personal entrapment that have formed as scar tissue over our past misperceptions. Should the process of dissolution of the old be resisted, it will surely be forced upon us through unpleasant means. The most sensible approach in these rapidly changing times is to co-operate fully and in utmost humility. 

The key to our freedom lies in full authentic expression.

To enter a reality of High Magic, the way in which the tiniest thought, word and feeling is articulated by us, in any form, has to be scrutinised in a way exponentially beyond anything that has ever previously been touched on. The Master of High Magic holds in his hands the potential to impact reality on all 8 fields of existence. This is not a possibility that can be taken lightly. The supreme responsibility that comes with this, is such that we will simply not be allowed to hold power of any kind so long as we may use said power, even unknowingly, to cause damage to the delicate and intricately woven fabric of life.

Everywhere I looked at the old forms of expression that I may previously have thought to be “beautiful”, and any expression that I tried to engage in myself, felt like nothing more than the glorification of illusion – it struck in me such a deep repulsion that I plunged into what can only be described as a type of depression, the disillusionment with what had seemed such a familiar landscape was so great and so total. The term “shock” very accurately describes the feeling that dominated the the vast majority of 2015, and well into 2016. Many times during this period I felt sincerely like I couldn’t go on another day, and frequently cried myself to sleep in a state of absolute desperation and despair. Yet still I couldn’t bring myself to pretend even for a moment that either what I had experienced previously, or what I was in the throes of right now, was ultimately “real”. I knew with every fibre of my being that I was in a process of total dissolution of the dream of a separate existence in a divided universe.

During this period of what seemed like enforced silence, only my partner truly knew even a snapshot of the extent of how broken I was feeling, and even then, I fell entirely short of being able to convey accurately what was really troubling me so profoundly. Blessedly, approaching the end of 2016, a new dawn began to burst forth over the horizon, which has launched me and many others whom I believe were experiencing a related process simultaneously into a glorious new era of entirely new interpretation of life.

Now, I feel the undeniable pull that I must reignite the power of the written word to convey the information that I feel so compelled to express, but this time from an utterly different angle. I may no longer speak on the play of illusion, but only on the fluidly unfolding truth of eternally indivisible Oneness with Infinity. The separation of distinct current from Ocean is a fallacy, that while valid, is not what I am here to elucidate. Untruth, dressed even in the prettiest of garments, is not the companion it promises to be.

My soul sings the new song, not of hailing the beauty within tragedy, but of the beauty that lies beyond the dream of tragic eventualities – the dream of the Infinite which is blossoming as the secret and sacred garden of our wildest imaginings. Listen on the wind and you may hear the whispers of its coming, uttered softly in the excited tones of glad anticipation of wondrous things, from the most pristine and innocent core of the hearts of all beings, slumbering or otherwise.

Of course, on the other side of this several year long process, I can once again appreciate why sadness is venerated as beauty by those who are entrenched so much in the depths of it that there is no other option, and through compassionate understanding, know that the way in which I am of most benefit is not to join the masses in their sorrow, but to experience as much joy as is possible to embrace in any given moment. The path of greatest joy is the road that leads to Heaven for all, and it must be paved by those who know how to follow it.

~

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Breaking the Chain of Generational Wounding

“If Wishes Were Horses” by Neighya – http://neighya.deviantart.com/

The last several years of my life have been largely dominated by trying to comprehend how exactly I might explain the large context for what I have to offer to the world, without stepping out of integrity, or getting trapped in any one area that could form an identity or a worldview, either for myself or for others.

This series of blogs is my attempt to begin that explanation, with the hope that it will eventually form a cohesive blueprint for how I move forward in the area of life that deals with relationship to others and humanity at large.

To preface, my journey over this lifetime in a nutshell has been one of “coming in” to a very desperate and limiting situation, in order that I might find my way through that and develop a roadmap for liberation that I could share with everyone, while walking myself free from age-old illusion at the same time. There has been nothing of being a victim of anything or anyone, as there never is, regardless of the situation – merely a co-created journey of great discovery, and privileged one at that. My approach to everything I have experienced has been one of “how can I discover the eternal truth hidden within this?”, and that is what has led me to where I am now.

I have noticed, over the last year, a large “theme” reveal itself, which appears to convey that my contribution to humanity is in the area of restoring visibility of the True Feminine in all its many facets, and in doing so peeling back the illusion that there was ever anything else. Many of us, men especially, carry deep-seated fear around the feminine, as it has for many ages been associated with manipulation, deception and quite frankly insanity. All of that is about to change on the planet. My interest here has been to slough-off the heavy cloak of ages gone by where illusion was still present, in order to prepare for the advent of a  new world that is entirely different from what we have known. Furthermore, to not only participate as it unfolds but to actually play a part in bringing it about. Because of having walked this journey myself, it is of total apparency that this is coming despite all surfaces appearances to the contrary. I have total assurance of this – I can see it.

Of primary importance in the unfolding of this new world is the way that we relate first and foremost to our own inner children, and following from that, how this translates to our relationship with children of the world. It is fundamentally important that we heal ourselves in order to enable future generations to rise from the ashes of the crumbling worldly structures and fly like the eagles they are destined to be. It should not be the case that any child in the future needs to heal themselves from what they experienced as children, and what will enable this to be the case is for adults of the current generation to deal thoroughly with their own wounding, until it is no more.

(To preface this next section, the below might seem like a very extreme reaction, but in my particular case we are talking about a situation whereby very severe abuse was present, which I will elaborate on at a later date. Therefore it may only be applicable in the definitive sense for others who have been or are still experiencing a similar scenario, whereas alternative solutions may be possible in other cases.)

Five years ago I sat down with my mother to have a serious conversation that I knew with every fibre of my being would change the course of my life, depending on how it went. I implored her with my last hope and explained that if things didn’t change she wouldn’t be meeting her grandchildren. Her response in heart-shattering coldness was, “I don’t care.” That was the breaking point for me, and the beginning of the grieving process for the seeming loss of what I had wanted most and would never have in the way that I had thought. It took me another three years to actually leave successfully (following two failed attempts), but I finally managed it with my head held high and full confidence that I would never need to look back, in May 2014. Immediately following that, having arrived at my new destination, I left the matrix of individuated life for the first time.

To explain, this was possible because I didn’t just leave a toxic familial relationship in the linear sense, but I left the illusion that it is possible to be separated from the True Mother – the real Divine Feminine that permeates all of life, but that is not visible to us through the overlays of distorted emotion and perception that we keep in place through binding beliefs.

There is nothing in the world that it harder than grieving for somebody who is still alive. Partly because it is just something that nobody can understand; unless they are in that position themselves, and partly because there is absolutely no support. It is just not a widely recognised phenomenon in society. This is the journey I have been on silently for the last five years, and it is now time to break that silence and step out into the full light of my purpose, regardless of how it might impact others. Thankfully, I am no longer experiencing this grief – I have passed a threshhold where I have stepped beyond it, all that remains now is to continue to allow all that doesn’t belong to be shed with grace.

One of the most limiting belief systems that is widespread among humanity at large is that we are bound in some way to our blood relatives, our ancestral heritage or lineage. The illusion of blood ties (I will elaborate later on how this is related to black magic that many are unknowingly practicing). The keyword here is lineage, which tells us that we’re talking about a linear track that will inevitably keep us circling around and around through our family’s karmic experience. It’s not until somebody comes along and finally shatters this illusion that it releases the whole line, ironically. The tyranny of ancestry is that we are unconsciously programmed to take on the karma that was never solved by those before us, across the three levels of body, soul and spirit, which make up the construct of the large linear matrix.

This is obvious in incidences such as where there is the belief of “hereditary” disease in the family – one person has arthritis, and therefore others do, or one person has diabetes or heart disease, and so others are pre-disposed to the same, and so on. This happens only because we believe in the illusion of genetics, when the truth is that our cellular makeup (and thus our DNA) is responsive to intent. It’s simply the case that nobody bothers to question the programming that has been stored down the line of familial heritage (and thus unconsciously taken up by anyone who feels psychically connected to the line, for whatever reason), and nobody bothers to intend something different for themselves.

Out of interest, I did suffer from arthritis as a child, until I realised the utter bullshit of “it runs in the family” and threw off the mantle that wasn’t mine to carry.

In my estimation, partly the reason we stay in the realm of this programming is because we deeply fear rejection by what has been the most fundamental tribe – the family structure, which was relied upon for safety and well-being during childhood. The idea of rejection, however unconscious, feels like it might equate with a sort of death, and this is potentially true from the perspective of the isolated child. However, the child only remains isolated so long as we keep it as an external, rather than taking it deep within and holding it from the core and depths of being for ourselves. Deeply internalised, it becomes the case that the inner child is surrounded by its own inner family, who provide the nurturing and support required to navigate the way out of binding matrices without the crippling sense of relying upon the approval of outdated and outmoded structures in order to survive. This is not to say of course that family isn’t valuable, but rather that we can build family to mean what we deeply want it to mean for us, without taking on board the nonsense that it really shouldn’t mean. As adults, we have the privileged option to educate ourselves about the dynamics of how these beliefs have imprisoned us, and move from a position of having our inner child at the mercy of others; to nurturing its ongoing presence from within: essentially becoming the functional family unit unto ourselves. It is at this point that we can build family anew. More will be discussed on this later, but suffice to say that without the dynamic geometry of an evolved inner structure, our lives are entirely controllable by the agendas of the world.

In my life, I made the choice that I would no longer suffer the repressed pain of my outer family (granted that my particular family dynamics were an extreme case), and further; that I absolutely refused to pass this onto my own children either directly via myself or indirectly via exposure to others. This to me feels like a supreme responsibility of my generation, yet nevertheless a very personal choice. At the very least education is necessary so that our children do not fall into the same patterns of delusional loyalty to dysfunction that many of us have agreed to, knowingly or otherwise.

Regarding repressed pain, I have seen that those who are deeply hurting are capable of unthinkable callousness, the iciness of frozen, unprocessed emotion compounding all human sentiment and chilling it to the bone. It could be said that some people are unfeeling, and this is true, yet there is more to this than it seems (speaking of those with capacity for feeling, ie. any being with a soul). They are unfeeling not because of an inherent badness or lack of capacity, but because they are unable to face the depths of their own agony, and so freeze over like a lake in perpetual winter as a survival mechanism, in this way essentially mimicking a soulless being. There is nothing that can be done to save these people, painful as that may be to recognise, unless or until they are willing to save themselves. In terms of integrity and impeccable use of power it is important to refrain from wasting energy in this area, and this is a primary challenge that many light workers struggle with, but that needs to be mastered in order to actually play a larger role in healing the world.

This wounding in its essence, whether in ourselves or others, is the repressed feminine, that part which each of us needs to come to terms with in our own journeys, internally, in order to heal it in our larger world. Only then will it disappear as a widespread phenomenon – that same phenomenon that is responsible for a myriad of atrocities. It’s clear how we cannot expect anything to change until we are prepared to embrace what hurts the most inside us. 

On my journey as a being, and fundamentally as a woman, I have been acutely aware since my early twenties of the crucial need to ensure that generations to come do not inherit these same self-destructive patterns. It is now a matter of survival for the human species. It is crucial that the generation of my age and younger, and perhaps slightly older, who have capacity to do so, take up the mantle of being the pattern breakers either before such a time as we meet face to face with our own children, or as we grow with them (for those who have already embraced parenthood). This I feel is the role of my generation. It is crucial that we heal ourselves first and foremost, and ruthlessly eliminate all that is destructive in our lives, regardless of the label that it might come with – that our children might be born into their power as an unquestionable birthright. It is these children who will rebuild the structure of our society from new fabric, after the old has been razed down. And razed down it must be.

In the old cosmos, individuation was through sustained tension. The scenario that I experienced was very carefully selected in order to enable that, as it was for all of us who experienced pain, and simply became an obsolete coping mechanism at a certain point. I want to reiterate the no. 1 thing that can be taken from any of this, if nothing else, and that is that absolutely nothing is personal. One thing I have learned as an over-arching theme on my journey over many ages is that we are always, no exceptions, dealing with the impersonal, transpersonal even, archetypal nature of life in its largest sense unfolding through our unique experience. The key is just to find that and internalise it – this is the essence of the discipline of metaphysics, which is by far one of my greatest passions. The metaphysical simply thrills me!

~

Work With Me – Ciara offers private coaching and healing sessions. Find out more at www.theblazingheartfoundation.com

Hello, Saturn

Recently I became aware of the astrological phenomenon known as the Saturn Return, which I have just entered into the first event of in my own life in linear terms. I can’t say exactly how I became aware of this except that I felt it, and then somehow, as always happens the written information to back up what I had sensed already simply landed in my lap.

Saturn is said to be the slowest moving planet, taking a full 28-30 years to complete an orbit of the sun whereby it ends up back in the same place in the cosmos where it started, albeit at a higher level of expression. Because of this, it brings with it the qualities and the lessons of perseverance, persistence, patience, discipline, and mastery of time, among many others. It is the ruler of Capricorn and Aquarius, and goes by many other names – “The Great Teacher”, “The Lord of Karma” and “The Great Malefic” being just some.

Come to think of it, I had been told about this phenomenon by somebody several years ago, and had shelved it in the back of my consciousness until such a time as it was directly relevant. I hadn’t, however, shelved the message – that a time of testing would come, and that it was necessary to have things in order to at least to a relative degree beforehand, allowing the essence of this to permeate my subconscious and influence decisions along the way.

I had heard that Saturn’s return can be hellish for an individual if they haven’t exactly been following the path most in alignment with their true purpose, yet on the contrary; if the opposite is the case, it can be a time of tremendous opportunity to crystalise previously-made wise choices into a more tangible materialised reality for the foreseeable future. The latter is definitely the case for me. This period, while coloured by a rather uncomfortable pressure to do something, is providing the impetus to thoroughly establish in a grounded, practical, realistic way in the vision for my life that I have been building towards for many years, aided by the power of this fortuitous ally. Furthermore, my dear old friend Saturn is blessedly highlighting all of the niggling little areas that need to be refined in order to make this landing possible, while ruthlessly shearing away all that needs to die off in the process.

Astrologically, for me the Saturn placement in my chart is in the first house of Self and in the sign of Capricorn. It’s been crystal clear to me for some time what this means in terms of my unique experience (from what I had sensed both consciously and unconciously – though really these are very close together for me), and what this period of the next few years would be likely to present as challenges and opportunities, but it has been of great interest to discover that this is actually “written in the stars”. So long as astrology is not taken literally in terms of it being a binding linear contract, I am certainly discovering that the more lucid mythical translation, mystical even, is of tremendous benefit at the moment. I feel sincerely that these placements were chosen deliberately in order to maximise every conceivable potential to grow exponentially into full self-realsation, and that their highest octaves can be called upon for support.

I believe that Saturn is transiting in general for the collective at the moment, which will be affecting all in some way or another – and thus this is far more an archetypal situation than it is a personal one. Those of us who are attuned to the collective simply feel the personal much more deeply, as we are all too aware of the powerful impact that an individual life can potentially have on the whole of existence.

With the first house of Self and self-expression, and the sign of Capricorn in my personal astrology, the experience of transiting Saturn as it appears to me thus far is bringing me face to face with my deepest fears surrounding self-expression, how I hold myself back and why, and the clear understanding of how this struggle hampers advancement in my vocational career – meaning the path which I know in the marrow of my bones is mine to follow, without any shadow of a doubt, yet simultaneously is the most challenging and difficult route possible. This transit is making it crystal clear that there is no turning back now; no avoiding the inevitable. The only choice is the highest choice to face the seeming challenges of the moment as they arise with exceptional poise.

I have wondered briefly how long I may be able to delay action that I know is required before feeling the impact of this transit heavily, and the answer to that question has made itself known quite abruptly. Two nights this week, I’ve laid awake until 5am unable to sleep with streams of information clamouring to be written pouring through the fibres of my being. It is the “story” of where I’ve come from and how I’ve got to here, the telling of which I’ve known would eventually have to come, there ultimately was no avoiding it. It appears now however that there is no stopping the torrent in the immediate sense, these are the labour pains of my full birthing into embodied  presence and they have started. This is it. It feels like a “now or never” scenario, and so with that said, this is my attempt to simply start somewhere and unclog the flow, ready to patiently wait and see what comes of it…

Regarding challenges surrounding self-expression, I have danced for many years around the sense that it was perhaps inauthentic to “tell the whole tale” (realising I am being very cryptic here), since many aspects of it are no longer relevant to me personally, yet I recognise that it is the whole picture that makes up the totality of what I have to offer to humanity in terms of my tangible contribution to human evolutionary understanding. Therefore, as suggested by the planetary placements chosen to deal with this lifelong “project” of full individuation, the only way to deliver the message effectively is to don a garment that is not only visible but understandable to others – to utilise the tool of a relatable “persona”, yet with my own stamp of total transparency, which I truly don’t think I am capable of deviating from in any case.

~

Work With Me – Ciara offers private coaching and healing sessions. Find out more at www.theblazingheartfoundation.com

 

 

Unsung Songs of the Feminine

That which enchants with words yet is spoken of a half truth is as lethal a weapon as one can imagine. And so I say unto thee, Children of Wisdom, beware of the serpent that whispers its poison.

 “Eons of unsung songs of the feminine have created subversive ways to enforce its will. These ways come out as speech patterns, subliminal tones, and in verbal content. They perpetuate the twisted world views of the previously suppressed feminine. The tongue has become the sword of the unheard feminine to support its agendas.”
From Cutting Edge 2 by Almine, available here – http://www.spiritualmastery.com/cutting-edge/

Listen to a preview from Cutting Edge 1 here – https://soundcloud.com/almine/the-cutting-edge-preview
See www.spiritualjourneys.com for more from Almine.

The Living Paradox

There is only One reality in existence, and yet we are each occupying our own reality. No two beings are seeing the same reality, and yet there is only One being in existence. The degree to which we align ourselves with the reality of the One Life determines which reality we are experiencing. It is a very complex matter than can be reduced to utmost simplicity, all the while understanding that we cannot possibly understand it. The Infinite of course cannot be reduced to anything, and that is the cornerstone of humility.

The Infinite projects forth infinite lenses unto the beauty of itself, which are us as individuations. We are each a lens that mirrors to the Infinite whatever is our lot. This is not a lot in terms of fate, but the grand purpose that the Mother has created us for, which is now enhanced with the priceless gift of being able to creatively add in details as we claim the spiritual maturity that we have earned. As each is the Infinite experiencing itself, it is impossible that we cannot be existing anywhere. Our lens is like a camera lens whose aperture can be altered to just a sliver or the widest panoramic picture that we can access. The choice of aperture is our focal point that dictates our experience, but not our beingness in all places at once (which is irrefutable). The Infinite permeates all, it is simply that we have forgotten we are that, yet we can remember at any time.

Self-reflection occurs when we stop looking at the Mother and try to find ourselves in reference to others. This is what makes us vulnerable to influence from others, because we have then entered a sub-created mirror reality. As we explore life others may try to make us a part of their personal reality, which unless they are also looking at the Mother is a mirrored sub-creation of their own design. A sub-creation indicates that it is a personal projection of separation and not the reality that the Infinite originally intended. Paradoxically however, all is Infinite intent, and thus there is nothing to align ourselves with either. The key lies in surrendered trust, which instantaneously solves so many problems without having to think about or figure things out. Additionally, we must be careful not to make others part of our personal reality and leave them to their own larger destiny in accordance with the Infinite’s plan.

Regarding surrendered trust to the Mother’s large plan, I have come to understand that the influence of others can be eliminated gracefully by first stepping out of their reality and then responding, rather than treating a sub-creation as real. We are not a part of sub-created realities, it only appears to be so from the small perspective within the “matrix” and from buying into the projections that others make of us, thus believing that’s all we are. Beings who are living as a product of a matrix can only see us as a hologram, they cannot see our real being and thus are not a good guide on what we are. As we become adept at interpreting life from the vastness that lies “beyond” (a misnomer), the matrix becomes a fluid stage rather than a static prison. The activation of the portal of the High Heart through bringing online all the required faculties is what will bridge the two realities of inner/outer, vastness/egg. In doing so, rather than cracking, the egg is simply dissolved, with the aim that the Mother will be seen once again by all. In essence, we are not going anywhere, not even out of the egg. The compressed perspective reveals that the egg is not there, and in fact neither is anything else that we have seen as a limitation.

We are not bound to realities created by another, nor are we bound in duty to pretending to be. We simply do not have to respond as if it has any validity. We belong in the arms of the Mother alone – the One reality of pristine existence, and it is of utmost importance that we don’t believe anything of being capable of diverting us from that. While we are in duality, the 7 fields of ancient shamanism, incorruptible white magic, spiritual healing, mysticism, metaphysics, godhood and movement are very useful tools to allow us to navigate appearances clearly and find our way out of sticky places. The tools and knowledge originating from Almine serve to activate these large perspectives, with the goal that through mastery they can eventually be used simultaneously to alchemically leverage life through any situation.

As the living paradox it is recognised that all is the Self, and yet “others” /the many) have their individuated journeys and individuated places at which they are at. Thus though we may see the Self as all, another may wish to see us as separate and make us a pawn in their personal game to fulfill their own personal agenda. We are not bound to the reality of another, our primary and only duty and responsibility is to the Infinite itself, and yet we are also responsible for harmlessly moving through life considering the whole at all times.

I have discovered that when buying into the sub-creation of another and forgetting our vastness it is next to impossible to be harmless because we feel we have to fight to get free, hence the understanding of how sub-created realities function is so important. The only thing to do in that instance is to step out of that reality first, then if any action is necessary it will be presented with clarity. In this way we can carefully avoid creating ripples of karma (resistance) that will continue to impact life long after an unpleasant encounter.

“The Doctrine of Thoth” and how it Obscures the Path to Perpetual Alchemy

The highest form of alchemy that we have known for many ages and that is regarded as the cutting edge of esoteric study is that which speaks of Mind as All. This is a false doctrine of limited potential. This Doctrine of Mind forms the basis of Hermeticism and Hermetic alchemy which forms the basis of all “new thought” spirituality. While such disciplines are not irrelevant, they can only take us round and around a contained fishbowl in a reality of opposites, with opposites breeding opposition.

Perpetual alchemy is that which utilises relationship with the Infinite so direct that the concept of “relationship” ceases to be as the current merges back into the Ocean, and the One and the many becomes just One. Hermetic alchemy is founded in and based on separation consciousness and no matter the equation it will still not equal wholeness.

The Doctrine of Mind is based on flawed premises of the mind which actually caused the fall in consciousness into separation. Therefore, it cannot possibly be used to repair the schisms in the psyche of man. New age spirituality promises a returning into Oneness, however it is only a “unity” of existence as comprehensible mentally and not true Oneness in the genuinely mystical/metaphysical sense.

Using the perspective of metaphysics it is possible to look at a phenomenon in the cosmos and trace it back to its originating point on a microcosmic level. The originating point of the “Doctrine of Mind” was the shadow god Thoth. It has been discovered that Thoth was an imposter god with a subversive agenda to usurp the reign of the true feminine (Infinite) on Earth, which was for a long time successful. He is associated with Atlantean times and the fall of Atlantis, as well as the mainstream Lemurian “alchemy” disciplines. The true alchemical secrets of the Ancients have been hidden for many ages for safekeeping and only very recently been released. Thoth as a being no longer exists since his deception was discovered by the Mother, however a morphogenetic fields resembling him continues to be worshipped.

The Doctrine of Mind also infers that mind is the creative force of life, which is no longer the case as it was changed in the Book of Life. Now, only the heart can create, an understanding which completely eliminates any semblance of truth in new age Law of Attraction style teachings. This change was made to prevent those with agendas from creating reality. It is the case now that only the pure of heart can have a creative effect on reality, however many have not yet realised this and believe we can be subject to holographic realities created by others. Furthermore, it is possible to create holograms of our own by enforcing our will on life mentally, but it must be known that this is a false reality or a “sub-creation” and thus is a form of black magic (accruing karma).

This is another thing that the Doctrine of Mind states – that reality is a hologram. This is an untruth, only FALSE reality is a hologram. The true pristine and immaculate reality of the Infinite’s core design is a 3D virtual reality, an entirely different concept. This requires some feeling into to really grasp the difference, as it cannot be understood in any linear sense. For those seriously called to walk the path of becoming impeccable stewards of all of life, processes are available to begin to embody this potential, the details of which are listed at the bottom.

In short, while we are plugged into any sense of false reality (ie. a static “matrix”) we cannot develop an alchemical relationship with Infinity. To enter into the perpetual alchemy of deep intimacy with the Mother of Life presupposes that we forsake all else and simply immerse ourselves in Her.

It is worthwhile understanding the larger context in which the Doctrine of Mind came about. It was from the off the product of an attempt to usurp the reign of the Infinite and control life. It is ironic then that Thoth through his many manifestations has come to be associated with the concept of resurrection, which in its true sense is a potential that we can only realise now through the embodiment of complete harmlessness.

For intensive perpetual alchemical training, the vast body of work by the mystic Almine is the primary go-to study area for highest possible revelation. Fellow mystic and dedicated student of Almine Anita Lucia Briggs has taken up the mantle to compile most relevant subjects into comprehensive training packages. Anita has almost completed the second run of her immensely potent and highly popular Foundation to the Miraculous Life programme, with Foundation 2 coming very shortly. Her work can be explored via her websites linked below.
www.innermasterytools.com
www.academyoffragrancealchemy.com

~
Ciara Young
http://www.theblazingheartfoundation.com

An Update in Consciousness – Leaving a Trail

I’ve decided to share a bit more about what I’m working on in consciousness as it strikes me that the information might be useful to others too, and also that it acts as a useful marker point on the journey to refer to later. I am currently preparing for the evolutionary leap that takes me completely beyond the collective human condition, having attempted it several months back and failing to sustain it. The reason that I had failed to sustain it is very simple – I succumbed to the test of fear. I had not built up enough leverage to power myself through the challenges that would come through what was revealed. This weird phase of consciousness that I’m in at the moment is the source of the “depression” I’ve been talking about, although from the surface it might look like any other human experience. I will try to explain what I mean by that in a more refined way. The depression for want of a better word that I have been experiencing since I initially leaped beyond the human kingdom into what lies beyond is as a result of seeing directly from a clearer vantage point quite the extent of the human games. Had I managed to keep on moving through the fear I would then have encountered a more blissful experience that alleviated this. However, in the face of the overwhelming challenge that included the location of hidden childhood memory implants I entertained the fear that arose in a way I did not intend to do. Combined with the shock of seeing the games and the effect that had on me I plumetted back down again and found myself in an awkward position. Unable to pretend I hadn’t seen down the rabbit hole but no longer able to play the games, kind of like the guy in the movie The Matrix who wishes he could just forget everything and enjoy a steak, there was no going back, but going forward was terrifying too. This is where I find myself right now. Now I am about to attempt the leap for a second time, this time more prepared and aware of what’s ahead. I am going to try a different approach this time, that being excitement for the potential of everything that is possible when not bound to rigid structure! This will put me in a much more stable position able to cope with whatever challenges come through centering in myself. In order to do this I first need to disengage completely from regular human interaction and withdraw all of my energy into myself. This doesn’t allow room for engaging worldviews (in other words ideas about how things are in the world). Despite appearances, the world is fine, and it certainly doesn’t need me to interfere with it. It definitely doesn’t need me to project on to it false and limiting beliefs. This depression that I’m experiencing is only due to trying to interact and live in old ways after such a huge change. I am going to pull away from this completely and establish myself clearly in my own reality. From there I can radiate outwards and what I experience will become available to all, but I cannot do it while pretending to live in everyone else’s world. The games are so absolutely subtle you cannot see how thick they are until you truly withdraw from them. If there’s a single person you’re still playing with you won’t be able to spot them even in yourself. For this reason I want to give myself every possible opportunity to suceed in my goal, even though the goal only exists from a linear perspective 😉

You are beautiful beyond belief, your vastness is inconceivable. The key to Heaven is in the palm of your hand, can you believe that this is true?

On that note, look out for the epic course I will be launching soon. It’s called Embracing Your Greatness and will be fully supporting you to do so!

Life Through the Eyes of the Cosmic Heart

Last night I lay on my Beloved’s chest listening to his heartbeat and marveling at how such a vast being could also have a physical heart. The seeming contradiction, the paradox of such a thing, was all-consuming of any mental capacity to possibly understand it. Any inclination to understand became swallowed up immediately by the overwhelming wonder of beholding the unfathomable miracle of his existence.

In the silence all things become seen, all mysteries may be known. Through the portal of the cosmic heart we find our way home.

The Dawn of New Day for Ireland – Ancestral Karma and the Suppression of Passion

After two more significant injuries since falling off my bike last week and a firm decision to nip this little run of mishaps in the bud before it gets out of hand, last night I spent several strenuous hours engaged in the inner process that I call “dredging”.

Dredging is digging through the subconscious with power tools, not just a fine toothed comb, to thoroughly shake up and hopefully unearth the underlying core of problems. It’s not for the faint-hearted, but it’s the most effective method I know. After an entire night including a sleep of effort I finally hit a jackpot with my findings this morning.

I have learned through experience that in grubby places of the psyche there is always some treasure, perhaps a single pearl to be mined amid a bed of tar. This alone makes the process of even searching in the first place worthwhile. Couple this with the understanding that as we set ourselves free we set others free by proxy and it is always worthwhile engaging in anything that potentially illuminates something.

I awoke this morning following a flurry of astral dreams, unusual for me as I generally travel far beyond the astral during sleep, to note that my body was buzzing. On inspection I realised that what was occurring was pockets of density stored in deep cellular tissue was dissolving. I had successfully accessed a pool of ancestral baggage and it was evaporating before my eyes.

I saw flashing through my mind’s eye the childhood of my maternal grandmother, followed by her adolescence and the events that unfolded there. I observed with interest the wall of religious shame surrounding her like a barricade since even before her birth. I saw the other women involved in her life, her mother, aunts and extended family and noted just the same thing in all of them. The over-riding emotion that governed their existence seemed to be an all-consuming shame. The shame of their female nature, their female bodies, shame of their sexuality, shame of their creative power. I observed the birth of my mother and the shame surrounding that, and saw that I had merely inherited something deeply unconscious. I realised that I have secretly resented being asked to wear the cloak of ancestral shame, but also that it was passed down through an automatically assumed tradition, not out of any deliberate malice. It was a survival mechanism, the passing of the core of something into the core of the next generation in the hope they would survive the expected process of life.

The tradition of shame is a plague that had cursed the women of Ireland for centuries, if not millenia, and in fact women most of the world over. An unwelcome gift brought to a land once infused by Goddess energy by an over-bearing patriarchal rulership who themselves felt ashamed of their own sexual urges – the cloak of shame was enforced on the perceived cause of all masculine-oriented problems; the unbounded freedom of the female spirit. Why should we be ashamed of our nature as sexual beings when sexuality is at the core of our ability to manifest life? This is an important question that all Irish women should be asking themselves, and in fact all women in general. Without our sexual nature intact, which is inherently creatively inspired, what are we but a land devoid of life, spirit, passion, poetry? I can hear the poetry of Ireland still flowing through her throbbing veins, but her voice has been all but drowned out by the roar of self-oppression.

Today I have chosen to rise up from beneath the unwanted mantle of shame and claim my place as Goddess incarnate on a land that is my home. I will not be driven out or pushed from my place, I will stand and dance and delight all with the beauty of my face. I refuse to be quashed or caged or to live in a state of defeated rage, I unveil myself as a representation of true feminine grace.

The religious programming that has dominated Eire is stored in the astral layer of existence, the dense etheric layer that is blocking our view of Infinity. It has become an almost solid wall of smoke obscuring the vision of her true countenance. This layer corresponds to our emotional body which explains entirely why Ireland has manifested a large problem with water (symbolising emotion). Emotion as our watery, flowing nature has become a dirty puddle of ages-old stagnation. This must be cleared and passion must once again take its rightful place on stage. It is the only way to resolve the plight of the Irish people. The creativity of pure-hearted sexuality must once again rule the day.

Mind Control, Trauma and the Red Dragon – Part 1

Warning: this post contains heavy-duty information on the Red Dragon, mind control and ritual abuse. Please only read if you are specifically interested in having this information on deep cosmic conspiracies.

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Last night I had a truly horrible experience that involved the direct “triggering” of memories from my childhood, some of which were “real” and some memory implants, which is a phenomenon I will explain. To clarify why real is placed in quotation marks, it is because in truth all memory is “unreal”. What is meant by this is that memory as a phenomenon is what the control mechanism of the cosmic matrix is composed of, in the same way that memory on a computer tells it what it can do and in what way it can do it.

To give a little context, I have been working very hard with the recent assistance of my partner Niels to bring full awareness into every part of my physicality once and for all. What helps me within myself is to engage in strenuous physical exercise, which completely opens up my energy system, but I also have to be careful with this. The reason I have to be careful is because it “opens up” areas where trauma may be located, so extreme awareness that it not generally a prerequisite for other people to exercise needs to be applied.

I should also add that yesterday I participated in a very large Belvaspata session which a sister Regina graciously hosted for free, and which I feel acted as a huge catalyst for me to dig very deep with minimal “backlash”.

Anyway, last night we or rather Niels decided that something that might help me was the “Insanity” workout series, so we did that. Or rather he did that, I got about 10 minutes into it and then lay on the floor not out of exhaustion but out of a feeling of “something isn’t right”.

I will try to explain in basic terms what actually happened, which dives very deep into some huge cosmic conspiracies. It touches directly on the subject of the Red Dragon, which is a topic that has come up recently for many of us again. What it was was that I sub-consciously detected specific subliminal sound waves within the music or soundtrack that accompanied the workout that transported me directly back into the core of the trauma. Couple that with the “opening up” effect of actually jumping around and it makes for a pretty potent recipe for disaster.

What I experienced last night was pretty much a re-traumatising and it definitely did not need to be experienced in that way! I did not expect that the video would contain those sound waves, as I do not watch these things myself. This has opened up a huge new area of awareness for me surrounding specifically how the nervous system is programmed and how it might stay that way. It is clear that many
people who have experienced trauma are also pathologically and perhaps sub-consciously seeking out re-traumatising via the matrix over and over again as a means of dulling the effect of the original trauma by normalising it so much that it takes the edge off. It absolutely does not have to be like this and it absolutely is not normal, there is another way to overcome fully that is actually healthy. It is the matrix as a whole that is re-traumatising and by understanding how the matrix functions we can actually heal the nervous system permanently. The Red Dragon is representative of the control of mind over the nervous system. The tyranny of mind is represented by the matrix.

It took me a little while to realise what was going on but I suddenly found myself transported in consciousness right back to the core memory implant of having been ritually abused and tortured by black magicians. I have been aware for some time that this was a memory implant but to actually “re experience” the frequency was quite a shock. The exact same subliminal sound that was in the workout audio was the exact subliminal sound that was associated with this kind of mind control. This immediately told me that the same group who make all mainstream entertainment are part of the same agenda directly under the leadership of the Red Dragon. The sound that is used in these workouts and almost every other form of video has direct mind-controlling elements that get into the sub-conscious (this is the reason why I don’t watch videos). The subliminal sound places the listener into an altered state whereby programming can be “data entered” in their “memory bank” (personal matrix). This memory implant was given to me when I was actually travelling to Earth via time tunnel.

This is all part of the larger structure that we call “the matrix” which is essentially a giant cosmic prison cell unless we’re aware of it. With freedom from the matrix in the truly metaphysical sense it becomes a cosmic playground, but while memory has any hold over us we are under control. The prison wardens or “playground bullies” are a race of very powerful dragons, with their “ringleader” being the Red Dragon himself.

I ended up about half an hour later huddled in a corner wailing and apparently flailing, trying to articulate to a very confused Niels why I was behaving like that. He described the scenario as “extreme”, I was trying to explain that that was how my life has been. It is extremely hard for somebody who hasn’t experienced or seen these scenarios to truly grasp how harrowing it is to be living it. The other elements of memory that surfaced and that were not specifically memory implants were only marginally less extreme.

Sentient life is not designed to be exposed to these frequencies, subliminal sound is the the root of all cosmic trauma. To fully explore the metaphysics of this information we will return to the topic another time.

To be continued…

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For more information on Belvaspata “Healing of the Heart” see www.belvaspata.com

For more information on Regina see www.thesongoftheself.com/belvaspata